Monday, March 5, 2012
Week 8
This week was hard for me. Reading and thinking about middle aged people and the changes that accompany them made me reflect so much on my parents. As midlife is this phase where you finally get to enjoy all that you have worked so hard for, I get sad thinking of everything they won't get to experience. My mom was only 36, and it's hitting me now how young that really is. I won't get to experience becoming friends with them now that I am grown. They won't meet or know their grandchildren, and I won't be able to care for them as they get older. At the same time, it makes me look forward to having my own family and being able to not only survive what I've been through, but to find success within that context. I particularly enjoyed the article "Is there love after baby?" because having a baby is such a game changer for a relationship, and I'm unsure of how I would navigate this in my relationship. Its clear that having a baby will not, at least right away, bring you closer together.
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Sorry I don’t see your bio anymore – did you loose your Mom? I agree it is much tougher for anyone to have a new family without more family around. I don’t know about babies not bringing closeness to parents though – I think it really depends on the culture and situation that families find themselves in. The happiest people I have ever seen so far are Hispanic, and they are often quite poor. They just have a love vibe about their families that blows me away both here and in Mexico, but especially in Mexico. I haven’t explored any countries south of Mexico yet. I don’t know, other cultures just seem to adapt to parenting differently. Be interesting to see some cross cultural comparisons of this whole parenting idea to see how different and the same families in various cultures and even geographical locations might be. As for having ten kids… no thanks.
ReplyDeleteYes, I lost my mom when I was 9, and my dad when I was 23. I'm also an only child, so I find myself in a rather unusual situation in life. I certainly never anticipated to be in this place in life, but I make the best of it every day by deciding to move forward with my life. It's hard for me, because as we are reading the course materials for this class, we are all reflecting on our own lives and development, and this is still all so fresh for me.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry to hear about your parents. That must be hard. Glad to see you here though - even as an old salt I'm learning a lot of things. The ideas presented in this class would help any young person be more aware of their own potential changes and of others, and I feel it really helps having more insight into what might come along. Living in San Diego for quite a while, I was in Baja Mexico often, and seeing families there made me feel like I really missed out on such a loving family vibe even though my parents did a great job of providing and never separated. Reading this weeks materials really sets the importance of good communication between couples, evaluation of goals (hopes and dreams) and pre-parent planning! You'll do great! :)
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